Entitlement is one trait that makes people feel as if they are more important than someone else in society. Though it might not be directed in this manner, the act of being entitled is reminiscent of being conceited. If a person is acting/feeling entitled, it can cause broken relationships and missed opportunities. Feeling entitled is not always a bad thing. An entitled person can come up with great problem-solving solutions even though we think they are a jerk while they are doing it. Regardless of whether entitlement is a small or large part of your life, there has to be a certain finesse when dealing with an entitled person. In this week’s blog, I want to talk to you about how to get around dealing with an entitled person.

We are all entitled in some sense or aspect of our life. It might not be as obvious as some people you may know, but it will be present in some aspects of your life. Here in America, we have the right to more freedom than in many parts of the world. We have rights and laws to keep us protected, but even those are not enough to make everyone feel contented. Taking a look at politics, for example, you can see two strong sides of the aisle. You have your extreme democrats and your extreme republicans. One side might be against firearm ownership, while the other side believes that people shouldn’t own firearms. This sense of entitlement is derived from the beliefs and truths they have learned in life.

The sources people learn entitlement can range depending on their environment and upbringing. You might have some country folks who love their guns and freedoms. On the other side, you will have your city slickers who believe in equality for all. It is challenging to choose a side because both make valid points, but what I urge people to consider before they seek justice is understanding how they have come to their beliefs. If a mob mentality runs your beliefs, then those beliefs that you are holding may not be your true beliefs. I’m a firm believer in finding what resonates with your soul. To do that, you have to see both sides of the story and choose one that resonates the most with you.

Dealing with people who are unable to control their entitlement outbursts can be challenging. When you go against someone who has these solid beliefs and truths, they will argue/fight with you to prove a point. However, there doesn’t need to be any validation as to why someone does something in their life. For example, when I was a teacher, I was deeply interested in intrinsic learning and teaching. Intrinsic learning is where the students learn through their own means with guidance from the teacher. I believe adults can feel the same when dealing with someone who is entitled. It is not the effort to change the person or their beliefs, but rather equip them with tools to make a healthy decision.

In our current society, entitlement is running rampant, which has created a divide in our country. This brings me to the old cliche, “You made your bed; now lie on it.” This means that you have to accept your own actions/decisions and any consequence that come with them. That is why I take a hands-off approach, mainly when dealing with an entitled person. I understand that karma and what they put out will come back around to them. What needs to be done to grasp society’s entitlement issues is not to be concerned about what someone says or does. Instead, we have to be the change we want for them. To be role models that are void of hate, prejudice, and discrimination.

If someone is being rude and has an overwhelming feeling of entitlement, it will take an experience to learn what is an acceptable truth for them. Many people are blinded and stuck in old habits that they fail to see what they truly desire out of life. It can take years for them to realize that their self-righteousness has pushed more people away than formed bonds. When looking at entitlement, there are two types of people. The first is the person you tell not to touch the stove because it is hot, and they listen. The second is the person who needs to touch the stove and get burnt to realize the truth. Many overly entitled people choose to learn the hard way for them to realize their actions. It seems absurd that it has to be like this, but we are not in charge of how other people act.

Dealing with people who feel like they have earned or deserve something can be volatile. They will be mixed with emotions and want to yell and have an outburst in disagreement. I know some people are reading this who are just making excuses right now and giving themselves a reason to remain entitled. They will think things like, have you ever taken care of four kids, cooked dinner, cleaned the house, went grocery shopping, went to work all day, and saved the world all in the same day? My first response to these people is to ask them if doing those tasks makes them feel special. More often than not, they are offended and yell some more, and I just smile.

Whether you agree with me or not, you have more to give than you give. Whether it was one more call, one more meal, one more mess to clean, one more rep, one more hour, or one more mile doesn’t matter. What matters at the end of the day is that you handle your business. You must learn to take all the excuses out of your life. I know people with no legs who work out at the gym. They do not limit their life because of their disability. People with a sizable entitled mindset are the same as any disability a person can overcome. It is something that holds you back, but it doesn’t need to define who you are and who you become.

One of the main issues with entitled people is that they tack on excuses because they are entitled. Women like to say they are on their period when they act up, but how can that be a valid excuse? For example, if you are in a meeting that will cost the company one billion dollars, will you or will you not do anything to make sure you get that contract? To top it off, let’s say that the company is yours. Excuses mean nothing because you are the boss of yourself, and you are the one in charge of how you respond to life’s unforeseen events. Knowing that you are in control of your thoughts, feelings, and actions shows proof that you are in charge of what comes out of your life. It is not about giving in to temptation and craving but rather giving up those ideas and ideals to start to live a life that makes your soul smile.

Dealing with entitlement becomes a challenge when you have to deal with any close relationship. There is a massive difference if you deal with an entitled customer at your workplace to when you have to deal with an entitled family member. Entitled people believe that the world revolves around them. I think there is a difference between someone who is entitled and someone who has strict boundaries. If you can decipher between the two, you can start to realize if your entitlement views our getting in the way or if they are just being disrespectful. Your emotions should be yours, and if someone goes against them, then it is up to you to decide if they should remain in your life. The good thing about the people we meet on the street is that it is momentary for the most part. Dealing with family can be tricky, but you have the right to cut out any family member who does not complement your character/soul.

We do not control the people we meet, but we manage the people we keep in our lives. The people we hold in our life should offer us some value. They should bring something to the table. If these people are just a waste of space in your life or are “anchors,” then they serve no purpose. This can be tough to deal with if the entitled person is family, but there is a solution even for these people. My best advice is to speak your truth to the person. It may be a hard pill for them to swallow, but you must tell them your mind so that you can keep your peace. You need to make sure you are good first. You cannot keep giving to them when they cannot even reciprocate the same actions. If you provide them with love, respect, and support only to receive harsh words and demands, that situation needs to be addressed.

In closing, dealing with entitlement is a necessary skill in western civilization. The freedoms we have are a double-edged sword that resonates with us or goes against what we believe in. There is a difference between being ignorant about your actions and knowingly going out of the way to hurt people. I find that many people in our society just hold a particular belief/truth, which is their right. Those people you can either separate from or accept the differences you both have. Today, many people will not accept another person’s truth because of how it makes them feel. If you can learn to detach that way of thinking from your logic, then dealing with an entitled person will be a walk in the park. There are two sides to every coin, and there will continue to be differences in the way people think and act. The sooner you accept responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, and actions, the more dealing with an entitled mindset will be of no challenge to you.

Until then,

Michael Rearden

CEO of Reven LLC.