In the most recent articles, I have spoken about what mindset is and how to get control of your life in some key areas. Those key areas are not only about your mindset and body but also about your future. The message was encrypted so you might have missed it, but I have been saying it throughout January 2023. Both in the blogs, podcast episodes, and the Motivation and Motion video series. That simple thing is understanding who you are and whom you hold in your life.
One of the early blogs I often reference, whether on the podcast or in my coaching sessions, is the idea of knowing who is in your life. Many people can create a plan for themselves, but they have a more difficult time staying committed and an even more difficult time knowing whom to incorporate that plan with. By incorporating people into your plan, you must be selective when you are making adjustments for your personal development growth. A plane, even the biggest in the world, has a capacity of how many people it can carry at a given time.
Though sometimes we push the limits and are successful, we cannot get into the habit of continually burdening ourselves with others, especially if they are dead weight. These people are also obstacles in your life that will hold you back once you start to reach a place in your life. They will allow their idea of the relationship to act as an anchor in your life, and they will slow you down from taking action. Right now, we are in an amazing time where we can turn around all of our given circumstances and hand in the cards we were dealt for better ones. Though that is a possibility, many people will not take this option.
The reason is that they are tied to dead weight and must carry it along until they decide to toss it away. For many people today, that dead weight is the relationships we have and will cultivate. Though it may seem ok on the surface, we all have negative people to be cognizant of, so we can know how to manage them. For example, a person who might be important in your life could be your parents or siblings. They could have a substance abuse issue and not realize it. This can be a huge negativity and anchor in your life. Many people do not know they have a problem until they hit rock bottom, but there are signs to see if this person is in your life.
I talk about this concept on the podcast often because it is so true when we think about regulating the people in our life. You have to figure out that after every interaction with a person or group is fine if you are left with a negative mind and lower energy reserves or if you find yourself in a more positive state executing with energy. We lose energy from being around certain people in many of our relationships. However, this might seem like a deal breaker it is not. Just because they drain your energy doesn’t mean you throw them out.
If someone is draining your energy, regulating how often you see them is important. I am not saying you should go years without seeing the individual or group, but you should figure out what is best for your situation. This idea is akin to ensuring your cup is full before allowing people to take it from you. So that means those people who drain your energy must be regulated to some degree. You will have to work this through by yourself or get a coach.
I do this for many of my clients when I find they have people in their life who are holding them back. What needs to be done is finding the right balance in the relationship—thinking of it like a baking recipe. Making the perfect dish might take some time, but the process can be repeated indefinitely. That means you will know how much of a person you can take and should take, rather than having a false sense of obligation towards someone who should have your time, attention, and resources.
This article is called “The Path Has Never Been More Clear” because we are increasingly aware of our New Years’ resolution boost. Though the boost is temporary, that final push can bring us over the finish line to victory and success. All you have to be able to do is see it in your present state. That means you must inquire about all the people you have in your life. You then have to figure out if this person is someone who slows you down or pushes you to be more without detracting from your mission.
We still have enough fuel in the tank to make a difference this year. However, for many, they will be allowing these people to get in the way. These people might mean well, want the best for you, and may have no ill intention for you or your future, but they do it passively. At some point in life, we must begin to live more purposefully and stop living on cruise control. Many people will take the easy road or the path of least resistance when they should instead look at ways to take the best path in front of them.
Though not everyone can see this path alone, they will one day realize that the people they thought they should be with and carry towards our summit of success were dead weight. They were people who shouldn’t get much of our time or effort. Depending on the person, it could be painful. I have had to make tough choices with the people I keep. I can tell you from experience that in the beginning, it might feel scary leaving certain people alone, but you learn that your path has never been clearer without them in your life. You become more focused and driven towards something beautiful.
Though we look at our future, I want you to understand that we all need people to achieve great things. Whether it be in business or the relationships we maintain, we must understand what we get from them. If you are not receiving a good deal and find your mindset in a place where you are negative, then it is time to allow that relationship to dissipate. Do not keep a relationship because it is what is familiar. I encourage you to find nurturing relationships rather than relationships that will inevitably be an obstacle in your life. The path is clear, and you must ensure no one gets in your way toward your best year and the best “you” yet.
Until then,
Michael Rearden
Founder of Reven Concepts