We have to be careful in how we speak to ourselves. Sometimes people think that they should focus on treating others with care and respect, but they forget about someone extraordinary. We have to get back to the state of the mindset that will deal with self-care, self-love, and self-appreciation. Many people forget about the number one player in their life, and they do not build this person up. When they fail to apply positive self-talk and admiration toward themselves, they will slowly unravel at the seams, leading to devastation in the future. In today’s T.U.S., I will be breaking down the idea of the importance of positive self-talk and how to apply it.

1. What is Positive Self Talk?
2. Why do I have to worry about it?
3. How can I learn to love myself more?

What is Positive Self-Talk?

How we speak to or about ourselves is called positive self-talk. The idea of positive self-talk is to be aware of how we communicate and think about ourselves. There is a difference between what you recite aloud and what you hold internally. I find that many people will say terms that they have found to be a commonality in modern society’s language, but they can be destructive at the subconscious level. For example, we might say that we are no good at something. This statement might be true, and we may not even mean any ill intent from that phrase, but it has a more significant impact on our minds than we believe. 

When it comes to any language we direct at ourselves, we will either be built up or broken down. Our emotions are typically under lock and key, and they do not come out when it matters. Feelings have become a personal belief that, if infringed upon, I have to feel a certain way because I am not getting what I want. This is far from self-care because your opinion doesn’t have to resonate with anyone else. However, if you hang around people with different views than you, you might have an internal conflict that causes you to question who you are.

Positive self-talk ranges from aspirations to poetry with the idea of growth, happiness, and love. Positive self-talk may appear like gimmicky things that people try to sell you on the corner of 5th and Washington. However, the quality of our minds will determine the quality of our life. Positive self talk-has many benefits without even looking into all the studies. Right now, if you tell yourself you love yourself, two things can make you happy. You will say, yes, I do and resonate with that belief, or you will be riddled with thoughts on why you should love yourself. Your mindset is more powerful than you think.

Why should we worry about how we speak to ourselves?

We should worry about self-dialogue because we will begin to believe it if we can recite it enough. Truth is a statement we hear or tell ourselves repeatedly until our brain founded that belief or view as the truth. When that happens, our brain will mold into that speech and have those words act as our initial thoughts. This is where an optimist or pessimist is born. Whether you see the glass as half full or half empty will be how your mind views the world. If you feel more positive, you will notice many good things coming into your life more naturally than with resistance and challenge.

Many studies have proven the effectiveness of positive words and the harm caused by negative comments through speaking with plants.  You might be thinking, “Hey, Michael, we are not plants.” Yes, you are 100% correct. However, I will say that a plant has life and death, the same as we have. They need water, sun, and nutrients to live. We need all the same things. One of the things I have written about before is how humans also need love. If love is absent in a child, there is almost a 33% chance that the child will die. It is incredible how pets play a factor in our development, but it would make sense if I broke it down for you.

The study we will be looking at today will be from Doon University. This journal talks about several studies on plants and how positive and negative words had a role in their thriving and dying. Studies have found that a positive frequency causes the plants to be more prosperous, while negative self-talk has adverse effects, including the plant wilting and dying. I find it amazing how plants can react to our negative language, but we are the same way when I think about it. If we are being bullied, our mind is a cesspit of negativity. That again shows us that if our minds focus on the wrong things, we will also expect the bad stuff.

This is not to say that we should live in a fairytale world where everything will work out. The concept of life is simple, we live, and we die. However, we should thrive on creating some meaning or worth in life. Many people do not go after that meaning because they do not believe they can. Their internal dialogue is not helping them be proactive in fulfilling their dreams. We have to start to see our life as a cumulation of things rather than just what we have and want. We also have to look at how we view and treat ourselves and dare to ask ourselves for the good things in life.

How can I learn Positive Self-Talk?

The first step in learning positive self-talk is to take out the trash. Many of the clients who work with me operate on multiple sets of limiting beliefs. Those limiting beliefs alone are enough to keep their mind negative and unwilling to change. What I have to do is unravel the mess that was created either by the client, society, or life’s circumstances and get everything in order. Once that is done, I can begin to insert better options for the mind to use in any situation. Developing a positive mindset can take some time, but it is worth it; I guarantee that.

One exercise I like to do with new clients who are lacking in positive self-talk or self-love area is to do the following exercise. I have them write down a list of 10 people they love dearly. It can be your mom, dad, dog, cat, etc. Creating a list of ten people can be difficult for some people, but it will depend on their lifestyle. On the other hand, people will have to choose between all these people because they do not want to leave anyone out. This has its problem too. Take some time now to write that list out before moving on to maximize the effectiveness of the next step.

Next step: After the list is in your hand, I want to see if you put yourself on the list. Is your name on the list? If not, why? If your name is on the list, you just have to ask yourself, in what ways can you love yourself deeper? Your journey to a stronger sense of self-love will be different depending on your path. The same thing happens that positive self-talk will help you appreciate yourself more and teach you how to love yourself and fill up your cup first. Many people try to fill up other people’s cups first before filling their own. 

Once you understand where you need to improve your positive self-care regimen, you can begin the work to change your brain’s natural structures. In the beginning, you fight the changes because you are applying the concepts of neuroplasticity into action. You are changing how you used to think and swapping it out for something more beneficial. There are many reasons why the brain will fight a change you make, even if it is an excellent chance to affect your life positively. The brain is naturally lazy and instead chooses inaction over massive action.

If, after reading this article, you are still in need of some assistance in reaching a better and more positive mindset, you will want to get yourself a coach. I have coaching plans to fit your needs and help you become the best version of yourself. That will range from how you view yourself and the world. Our mindset can be complex to navigate without a guide, so do not walk that journey alone for no reason. Find someone today who can help you reach a more positive state of mind. When your mind is more favorable, you will move to more positive things in your life. That is going to be a win for you, in the end, so do not wait to change your life into the best it can be. 

 

Until then,

Michael Rearden

Founder of Reven Concepts