How we view a specific situation or scenario is a mindset in the end. I speak about this quite often on the podcast, and it is something I am becoming even more aware of as time goes on. I find that this awareness at an early age can make the difference between a life filled with abundance and a life filled with misery. Though today I will share the way of thinking with you, it is not a guaranteed thing because it is dependent on your mindset. Your environment will primarily form that mindset, so what I will share with you today will be more like a tip than a guideline because if your mind is not ready to comprehend what I am about to lay out, you will fall victim to your destiny.

It might seem that sometimes in life, people are destined to fail. They might have the best intentions, but they get a wake-up call instead of a victory lap when they try for something in life. Many people are not ready to accept who they are, and when that happens, it stops them from becoming who they will be. This contradicts what I speak about in some manner because I believe anyone has the power to change their mindset and change their life. The sad truth is that I know not everyone will make that change even though they can make that change.

This can confuse people if they do not understand how change comes about. Transformation comes through the use of energy or neglect. If we fail to apply energy, we don’t win, and if we neglect to act or apply energy, we lose by default. That means that we have one positive road to go down, but the chance of success is not 100%. I do not have a solid number to give you on what percent of people will succeed in life because it just depends on mindset and resiliency. If you can remain steadfast toward your goals and ambitions, you will be on a good path. However, many people will take the lesser road because that is what our brain favors. 

There is a way for the brain to see a challenge or a high-energy item as something it favors rather than something it should avoid. It does go against our natural human tendencies, so in a way, we become a monster of the human race. We will purposefully ignore our instinctual way of thinking because we understand that our instincts do not play a role in society today as they did a million years ago. If you are interested in rewiring your brain, you can read this article and get a good understanding of what to expect. I will tell you that not everyone will be able to change due to emotional factors or poor habits.

There is a story of two young boys growing up together. The boys had a stay-at-home mother and a father who would go to work and make all the money for the family. The father would come home, get drunk, and yell and abuse his wife. The two boys saw how their father acted and learned from his ways. Fast-forward, some time has passed, and the two young boys are older and have their own families. One boy would go to work and come home and drink and beat his wife. When asked by a friend why he drinks so heavily and mistreats his wife, he replied, “Because I watched my father.” 

On the other hand, the second son also had a family and a wife. However, this man had a different outcome than his father and brother. This brother was a successful business owner and has reached large amounts of success in his life and business. He had a wife he loved, and he didn’t drink alcohol. When asked how he could reach such success in his life in an interview, he simply replied, “Because I watched my father.” Though he had the same upbringing as his brother, the outcome was different. How he viewed his father and alcoholism was something to avoid, while the other brother saw it as usual and what it entailed to be a man and a husband. That leaves us with the question, if the environment plays a critical role in our development, how can one person see the environment in a particular light?

I have many theories about why some people can grow up in the ghetto and make something out of themselves while others stay precisely where they are. One of the significant factors is going to be education. Having a solid education will allow a child to build their critical thinking skills. This will then let them see the glass as half full or empty. That means that optimism and pessimism plays a role in how their brain will work. For to have a more optimistic brain, many factors must be met, such as a loving and caring upbringing and all of our basic needs fulfilled.

The loving and caring aspect will help you see the world in a better light. It will also have a positive side effect on your mental health and stimuli in your choices. If you are confident, you will do something more readily than if you are timid and fearful. That is why these children who have a strong support system at home have the advantage when it comes to success. This is where white privilege has come into the mix because many black kids will grow up in a single-family homes and are behind mentally, which can be why they do not have much success in life.

I do not believe that a circumstance like not having a supporting family is an adequate reason why a child fails or succeeds. Though it does play a role, that does not mean a child will fall victim to their environment. For example, look at Benjamin Carson; he was raised by a single mother and grew up in the ghetto. Why was he able to make something out of his life? The Gifted Hands tells his story in his book, but he created a better life because he viewed his situation in a different light and was determined to change his circumstance. His mindset was thinking differently from the typical person in his position.

One might want to know how they can change their mindset if they are in a situation like that. I will say that it is not easy. It will be a journey of realization for the youth to conclude what they want in their life and how they will get it. If a child can have that critical thinking, they are on the right track. We also have to look at other factors, like friends, distractions, siblings, etc., as alternate factors to be viewed as. Though there will be outliers in all these areas, understanding what is around you will feel a lack of adequacy. You are on the right path if you can see the wrong things and focus on the good stuff instead.

Similar to how in our story, the mindset of one brother was to mimic the father and accept the actions as expected. In contrast, the other brother could see his surroundings and ask himself if this was something he wanted later in life. Many people will accept their circumstances and play the victim later on in life. This is also where the wage gap fallacy comes into play. Women, by nature, are more agreeable; however, they have become more masculine in recent years. There is nothing wrong with that; it is just a focus of mindset we need to be aware of. If we can be mindful of a situation, we can ask ourselves if we want to replicate it or change it.

When we want to change our situation, we will need an abundance of wisdom more so than knowledge. Knowledge would be great, but it leaves trial and error to the individual rather than learning from someone else’s mistakes. One boy from the story followed in his father’s mistakes, while one boy avoided those mistakes by seeing what the alcohol did. One boy saw normal and manhood, while one boy saw destruction and a false label of society. Many people will try to cover up their unhappiness with substance abuse. It takes a highly emotional person to see and understand that a particular situation does not have to be the result.

In closing, the result of how we interpret the things we learn in life will be contingent on many factors. There is no perfect formula for what makes a successful person successful, but there are common habits among the highly successful. The same is true when we are growing up and how we view negativity. There will be habits that we can create and avoid that will give us a better chance of forming a stronger and more positive mindset. This is where many people fail, and they break down due to circumstance and upbringing rather than create an idea that they plant in their minds. 

People might not realize what that is today. However, the mind can create opportunity by planting a symbolic seed in its mind. That seed will one day break through the rubble, which was rock bottom, and begins to grow into something meaningful. What needs to happen next is that we have to continue to nurture our mindset with positive things and talk to help that idea stay alive. This is where having a mindset coach can come in handy because they will be able to facilitate and discern what thoughts and actions are necessary for the best growth possible. Mindset might be up to interpretation, but some methods can tip the scale in our favor that will help us see a situation as an opportunity for change rather than what transpired. 

 

Until then,

Michael Rearden

Founder of Reven Concepts